Most Hilarious Moment.

I have been asked millions of time in my life the question: "What is your most embarrassing moment?" I always hate this question, and here is why:  First, because I just don't have a moment that I felt so embarrassed that it sticks out more than any other embarrassing moments in my life. And secondly, because it is usually asked during a silly "ice breaker" game with a bunch of strangers. So everyone is looking at you and judging your most embarrassing moment- they are hoping for something hilarious, and I usually can't preform in the way they that everyone wants- thus their first impression is that I obviously must be boring. However, I have recently found a new story to tell, should this event ever occur again.

Now, I titled this post "Most Hilarious Moment," in place of "Most Embarrassing Moment," and for good reason: this happened in front of 6 year olds, and thus, they were unphased and totally unreceptive to the event, making the whole event less embarrassing and more hilarious. However, with a different audience, it might have turned out differently.

I was having a particularly "cranky teacher" day, in that I spent a good deal of time having to lecture my students on following the rules and being respectful and less time just laughing with them and enjoying that day. I have told them about 39 times that when it is time to put the legos away, they have to put the legos away, rather then place their creations hidden under book cases and behind other classroom tools. It infuriates me to find lego pieces throughout the room. I had warned them on this day that if I found any hidden lego creations around the room I would have to put the legos up for one week, and they would not have it for indoor recess, or choice time. So, we had just finished cleaning up and were seconds from starting centers. As I walked up to the front of the classroom I noticed a giant spaceship lego creation stuffed between the shelf and the heater. Naturally, I was annoyed. ARGGH! So, i said, "Boys and Girls, unfortunately I just found some hidden lego creations, and that menas I have to put the legos up." The kids moaned and and watched as I bent down in a fit of rage to dislodge the hidden legos. It was well hideen, this first grader meant business in hiding it. So, I really had to bend and squat to get this one out. As I did so, I heard this...
"RRRRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPPP."
My eyes nearly burst out of my face, I quickly stood up, and to my surprise said something out loud that I meant to say to myself (all the while, my surround sound microphone is turned on): "did my pants just rip!?!?"
The class loudly responds with: "YES!"
Well, in the words of Rachel Green, "isn't that just kick you in face, spit on your neck, FANTASTIC!" My pants had ripped just next to the center seam above my right cheek pocket all the way down to mid thigh.  My bright purple underwear were available for all of my class to see. I was wondering if there was enough of a rip for their little eyes to catch the black lace at the top of my underwear- the last thing I need is a first grader to go home and tell their parents they saw my black lace underwear at school.
But oddly, the first graders seemed unphased. After they stated "YES!" I just turned around and tried to "act normal." They were still on the legos being put away. They still moaned. They still were blaming kids for the lego creation that was hidden. They did not care even a little bit about my purple underwear- THANK GOD!
So I sent them to centers in a VERY awkward maneuver around the perimeter of the classroom, and walking with my back to the wall at all times found my snow pants- located directly on the other side of the classroom from where I had been- and put them on over my regular pants. Not a single kid said another word about it. I however, fought back strong urges of uncontrollable laughter, and mourned the loss of my very favorite khaki Maurices pants my sister had bought me for Christmas. RIP wonderful khakis. :(